


On Hazardous Seas

by NightsMistress



Category: Young Wizards - Diane Duane
Genre: Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-12-05
Updated: 2012-12-05
Packaged: 2017-11-20 09:20:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,225
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/583756
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NightsMistress/pseuds/NightsMistress
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Four ways Carmela changed the universe and one way it changed her.</p>
            </blockquote>





	On Hazardous Seas

**Author's Note:**

  * For [teacup_of_doom](https://archiveofourown.org/users/teacup_of_doom/gifts).



> My thanks to my betas for being the words of wisdom that this story needed. This story wouldn't be what it is without their patient guidance

_i. Education (July 12)_

Every year, without fail, the tertiary educational facilities across the galaxy organized what Earth humans would call ‘summer classes’. While anyone was able to apply to be a student, selection was fiercely competitive, with any successful applicants being widely considered to be both something special and, for the more cynical, something of a nerd. Someone choosing to enroll in the class not just to attend the class, but to continue discussing the subject with his or her classmates afterward just for fun would be considered not only a nerd, but perhaps the most nerdy of them all.

It was a title that Carmela was wearing with pride, much to the continual annoyance of Kit. He had called her a nerd to upset her and was instead upset himself when she sweetly pointed out all the times that he had done some extra study (every day) and how enthused he had gotten about some obscure fact he had learned (often). It wasn’t _her_ fault that Kit seemed to be allergic to socializing with all the fascinating alien species that the galaxy had to offer, focusing instead on _boring_ things like duty, responsibility, and other words that really meant ‘sucking all the fun out of the universe.’

“It’s _tragic_ ,” she declared dramatically at the third study session, dropping her knapsack onto the table. Her bag nearly clipped the protective bubble around the junk food of the nearby Vlir student but missed by a inch, much to everyone’s relief; had the bubble’s contents been carelessly exposed to oxygen, a very messy explosion would have ensued. This would not endear anyone to the Stationmaster at _all_ , even if Carmela was good friends with him.

“He can talk to _anything_ ,” she continued. “I _swear_ he’s flirting with the television to get it to do what he wants -- I know he doesn’t talk to his girlfriend like that. And yet! Yet, he doesn’t have a _single_ friend off-world that he can do things with that aren’t wizardry.”

“That _is_ his job,” an Elin’ca pointed out in what was probably meant to be a reasonable tone.

“Of course it is,” Carmela agreed with a dismissive wave of her hand. “But he forgets that not _everyone_ is a wizard or even _wants_ to be one. So whenever he meets someone, they’re always a wizard and he _forgets_ that non-wizards can help too.” She spared a moment to roll her eyes at the ridiculousness of little brothers who didn’t realize that they were not the most awesome person in their family (that would be Carmela, thank you very much).

The group all exchanged rueful glances, or whatever passed for a rueful glance for their species. The wizards they had known were all noble people, devoted to their work and never dreaming of intentional cruelty to anyone. The problem was that when you had dedicated, self-sacrificing, _good_ people with powers granted to them by the creators of the universe running around, they tended to want to protect people who _weren’t_ given these powers. In abstract, it was an admirable goal. In practice … well, sometimes it could get frustrating.

“So why don’t we prove that we’re equal partners in this,” Carmela suggested, leaning across the table. “Remind them that you don’t _need_ super powers to protect the universe. Like Batman!”

The conversation took a ten minute detour while Carmela attempted to explain who Batman was, only to give up. It was just going to be one of those cultural things that wouldn’t translate well. 

A few days later, Kit informed her that while out on wizardry, an Elin’ca had patched him up and said to pass on his best wishes to his sister the Mighty Bat Powderer. Carmela refused to explain where that came from, but afterward changed her chatroom name to it - it _was_ pretty funny, after all.

_ii. Advisory (August 1)_

A few weeks after the summer class ended, Carmela received a message from a scholar working on the rafting project. She’d been getting messages like this ever since Mamvish let slip once that there was a human with a gift for understanding long forgotten languages, but for the most part she hadn’t really been able to do much with it. School got in the way, as did the vast interstellar distances. However, she was at loose ends for the remainder of the summer, so she might as well have something to do that wasn’t helping around the house and driving Kit to distraction by making pointed suggestions about his new-minted romantic relationship with Nita. So she went for an interview with one Riffir m’Harzri l’Krzti, the lead scholar on the rafting project for a newly discovered species -- which, incidentally, was one that featured quite prominently in the Elin’can mythos. She took that as a sign.

“Hi!” Carmela announced, waving at the middle aged Lreri waiting for her in a private room at the Crossings. She was wondering how zie would fit into one of the rooms — Lreri grew for their entire life and Riffir was nearing hir third century, with the size to prove it. She wondered if Sker’ret had a size distortion wizardry on the room, allowing one average sized humanoid in the same space as an alien approximately the size of a freight train and carriages without the two becoming remarkably intimate with one another on a first meeting.

“I’m Carmela Rodriguez and I want to help bring the …” and here she faltered. The correct pronunciation of the species they were wanting to bring out of stasis required not only the spoken word but radiation on a number of wavelengths, none of which Carmela actually had any control over. Though, she had to admit, if she _could_ control x-rays then she would actually _be_ a mutant and all that delicious teasing material for Kit would be wasted.

“We’re calling them the Protheans,” Riffir interjected. Carmela blinked. She was aware of the growing trend of human video games going out into the galaxy, and apparently Mario Kart was _astonishingly_ popular (which only went to show that some things translated easily across all species). That said, she certainly didn’t expect a Mass Effect reference from someone who was closer in age to her parents. She made a note to ask Riffir -- if she got the job -- whether zie romanced Garrus or not.

“Right. So I was wondering if you needed any help with that.”

Riffir took an awfully long time to answer, enough so that Carmela was a little anxious.

“As a researcher, your skills would be invaluable. But …” it was here that Riffir gave her hir species equivalent of a very wicked grin by the fur of hir pelt leaning forward. “I think you can be of more use somewhere else.”

As such, two days later the rafting team tasked with bringing the alien species nicknamed the Protheans (which, Carmela noted, looked more like furry humanoids that stood quite a bit taller than even the tallest human) out of stasis had a new addition, a bright young recruit with a wicked grin, a laser curling iron, and a knack for languages. It was a good thing, too, as a species that put itself into stasis over fear of a great calamity tended to be both very afraid and very hostile when resurrected.

The following ten minutes involved a lot of shooting, with the rafting team looking like they were about to be overwhelmed very quickly. That was until the newest recruit stood up, shot the stasis machine, and then screamed out a word in a language that hadn’t been spoken in thousands of years. As everyone stopped in shock, Carmela stepped forward, armed with her newly fashioned device that would allow her to communicate on the correct frequencies to present herself as a knowledgable person to this new species. Having a little brother who was technologically minded did have its perks.

“My name is Carmela Rodriguez. Welcome to the galaxy,” she continued, still in that language. “It’s changed a bit since you were last here, but some things should remain constant. Like … _no shooting friends_.” Then she smiled.

The fighting ended shortly after that.

 _iii. Shopping (August 3)_  
After preventing an interstellar war between an ancient species and its neighbors, including one that venerated them as near-gods, Carmela decided that the only thing to be done was to go shopping. The nearest shopping mall wasn’t one that she’d been to before, being that she was at least four star systems away from her usual stomping grounds, but like any good interstellar tourist Carmela came prepared.

After exchanging her fun-sized Mars bar for a truly shocking amount of money, Carmela laid waste to the stores in the mall. It was Kit’s birthday soon, so she bought him something that was either a decorative ornament or a very kinky sex toy (she suspected it was actually the latter, the sales assistant was pulling her leg, and if that was the case then it would be the gift that kept on giving), and she picked up Nita’s Christmas present from the astronomy section. Unfortunately, the rest of her family would probably prefer something from eBay than from an alien world -- Carmela did _not_ understand why they had such terrible priorities -- so she then window shopped for herself.

She was receiving remarkably attentive service, albeit tinged somewhat with terrified awe, and initially Carmela found this quite peculiar. It was only when she looked at what she was snacking on while shopping -- a chili chocolate bar -- that she realized just what was going on. After all, she was nibbling on what was, essentially, an entire planetary economy, flavored with one of the most notoriously spicy condiments in the galaxy. She wanted to kick herself for not noticing sooner -- she was normally far better about these kinds of things. However, the damage was done and she might as well make it work for her.

“Are all humans like you?” she was asked by a particularly bold sales assistant, who had almost choked as Carmela casually finished off the chocolate bar and tossed the wrapper away.

“Yes,” Carmela replied, biting back the urge to say that there wasn’t a person in the galaxy like her, thank you very much. Instead, she watched in consternation as the rubbish bin was emptied onto the sidewalk and its contents searched for the wrapper of Carmela's chocolate bar. Sighing, she reached into the rubbish and fished the offending wrapper out and handed it to the nearest alien.

"Don't lick it," she advised. "The chili quotient is seriously going to blow your mind."

Of course, they did lick it. Carmela then spent half an hour having to explain that 'blow your mind' was meant in the idiomatic sense and that yes, of course, she was serious about drinking a glass of milk to ease the burn in their mouth. It probably didn't help that, as she had nothing else to eat on her, she ate another of her chili chocolate bars (though this time she was far more careful to make sure she disposed of it into her pocket to throw away later). Finally, after it was determined that Carmela's species was one blessed by the Powers with taste buds of steel and a bountiful supply of native flavors to test that assertion, the local authorities agreed the incident was hardly her fault--though they advised her in the future to declare all biological hazards before entering populated areas.

To cap off her day, Carmela still didn't manage to pick up the day-glo yellow sandals that she was eyeing. However, it wasn't all bad; Kit's face as he heard about humanity's reputation as a species of terrifyingly daring and reckless individuals was worth the inconvenience of having the shoes delivered to her.

 _iv. Diplomacy (August 10)_  
It was inevitable, she supposed, but eventually Carmela’s adventures caught up with her. The alien species she had helped to resurrect and then promptly shot at (when they got uppity and tried to kill her first, mind you) wanted to meet with her and discuss how they could best integrate with the galaxy as it was now. Kit had refused to let her go off alone, and wherever Kit went Nita was sure to follow. No one was really quite sure how Ronan got caught up in it -- when asked he just shrugged and said that he’d been told to come along but refused to say by whom -- but having three wizards accompanying her seemed like a good idea at the time.

Then, after a few moments when everyone stared at one another, the firing started, resulting in the four human teenagers hiding in a closet and trying to work out just what on earth had gone wrong. Two books were pulled out, and Carmela was highly amused to note that Kit’s section on interspecies romantic relationships was _three times_ the thickness of Nita’s. She turned to Ronan to point this out, only stopping when she noticed the absent stare of a wizard checking his memory-based manual.

Carmela turned her mind to what she knew about the new species -- or rather, what little she knew. They were really keen on shooting things, there was something bizarrely rigid in their language structure, she had spoken to one of their client species when she was attending the Crossings’ summer school -- but none of these facts on their own told her what she wanted. There had to be a way they all fit together...

And then Nita huffed impatiently. “They want a hierarchy,” she said in explanation, exchanging looks with the other two wizards. That was when it clicked for Carmela: she had been told that the Elin'ca had taken a number of traditions from their gods, including a method of establishing dominance that could best be replicated by, of all things, kissing. Carmela had taken great advantage of that custom during her study sessions, and she was well aware that there weren't any coincidences in this universe, especially when you hung out with wizards. From what she recalled, social structure was important, so much so that any deviance could not be tolerated. In fact, they were being remarkably tolerant in not nuking the four of them where they stood, given that from what little Carmela had picked up, they had brought to Carmela and her entourage their leader and her trusted assistants, clearly indicating where they all stood in their social hierarchy. The four humans, on the other hand, had acted far too familiarly with one another. If not resolved quickly, it would be an unmitigated disaster.

After the problem had been identified, the four of them went about determining the hierarchy. First, Ronan kissed Kit, a perfunctory kiss that left Kit squirming and Ronan trying not to laugh. Next was Ronan and Nita, who Carmela suspected were prolonging it purely because of Kit’s indignant squeaks. Finally Nita and Carmela kissed, which was strange but not altogether unpleasant. She’d had worse kisses, though if she was going to explore her sexuality, she supposed that next time she wouldn’t do it with her brother’s girlfriend.

With that established, the rest of the diplomatic mission went smoothly, with a number of concessions being made in favor of humanity. All in all, it was a good day.

Afterwards, Tom had pointed out to them that there was another way, and the three wizards exchanged guilty looks. It wasn’t until Carmela looked it up later that she realized Tom was right: the most senior wizard could have nominated themselves as more senior than Carmela, despite the fact that Carmela was the one who caused everyone to stop fighting at the first meeting and had been explicitly requested by the Protheans as they were very impressed by her. There was no risk to Earth once a hierarchy had been established. The only loss of status would be to _Carmela_ if one of the wizards asserted that they were higher in their social hierarchy than her, and she was touched that Nita, Kit and Ronan would choose to preserve that, sacrificing their own status to raise hers up.

That said, she suspected they enjoyed their kisses a little _too_ much to be chaste, so she didn’t feel too bad about it all.

_i. Alteration (August 20)_

After the best summer vacation Carmela had had drew to a close, she started writing to all the universities with a good science or linguistics faculty. Most wouldn’t give her the time of day, which she expected. The galaxy was wide, after all, and not all species are fond of humans. Some wrote back, but the faculties were on the other side of the galaxy, and she sadly put the brochures to one side. It would be harder to convince her parents to allow her to study off world if they had to travel to the other side of the galaxy to see her for Thanksgiving. Though it _would_ make it easier for everyone to avoid seeing relatives they didn’t like.

Eventually, she was able to narrow down her options to half a dozen universities that met her criteria: near a major travel nexus, good linguistics and science departments, facilities for oxygen-breathing bipeds, positive views of humans, and where she already had a friend studying. Applying for funding was harder, though Kit helped her with that, drawing on the credit that any wizard accrues and allocating it to her. He just shrugged and smiled a little when she asked about it, pointing out that it would be easier to convince their parents if she already had a way of paying for it that wasn’t going to utterly destroy her college fund with just the tuition fees for her first year.

The night before she presented the plan to her parents, complete with answers for the usual questions of ‘what happens to you after college?’, ‘can you get a job on Earth afterward?’ and ‘what if something happens to you while you’re away?’, she rehearsed the speech in front of Kit, who was oddly thoughtful.

“You wouldn’t have put this much thought into anything before,” he said after she finished. “You’ve changed.”

At the time, Carmela dismissed it with a flippant wave of her hand. “Or, little brother, you’ve _finally_ realized how awesome I am.” 

Afterward though, while she was redrafting some of her answers with feedback from Kit, she wondered: had she changed? She wasn’t convinced. One of the themes that kept coming up in her school report cards was 'Carmela is very intelligent but doesn't apply her gifts', and it was true that she didn't. She was the only one not surprised by her SAT results, as evidenced by the exasperating looks of shock she got when they came out. She had just decided to try, that was all. It mattered, much like how everything she did this summer mattered. She helped to bring an alien species out of stasis and build diplomatic relations with them, and it wasn't everyone who could say that.

If she had changed, then it was only that she’d found something she could be passionate about. If that was a change, then she'd take it. She then signed her forms with a flourish, marking the i’s with stars. The galaxy had better watch out, because Carmela was coming for it.


End file.
